Pace Yourself

Today was pretty good, eh didn't really do much to say anything about. If you read my other blog you kind of know what has been on my mind lately. I have been thinking of things I need to change in myself. And I planning a new years resolution. (I know what you are thinking, No one ever sticks to those) I am hoping that I can this time. NOT hoping I AM GOING TO. I will do this. I also have been thinking that I loved when I had my dance class, I think I am going to find a dance company or something I can go to once a week, make me excited for a tuesday or wednesday or something like that. YEP I will be looking into that this coming up month. I have also been thinking, I cannot belive that I havnt seen Griggs since July, and I cant belive that this year is almost over. I cant wait to see him either. YAY. I kind of miss that kid. a lot. I sometimes read through old things we talked about to just remember him. Its kind of silly but when you dont talk for days upon days, its nice to look back and think about when we could just talk. I am still waiting and plan on keeping it that way. I need to for me. I know that it sucks going this whole long time without him, gosh cant i get a boyfriend who is in the same zip code or even the same continent. I am so proud of what he does though, so I forgive him for leaving me for a hell of a long time! haha Like it would matter if I didnt. Well I miss him. Work is going to be not so fun working a triple shift (B O double then to AE) then thanksgiving then AE at 6 am to 11 then to brick oven for another double. YUCK. haha well good money I hope :D

Pace Yourself by the higher, I am trying to focus on so many things at once that I think I need to pace myself in doing so because change doesnt happen over night. I'll keep you posted.

Down

Today sucked. I have no further explinations except that I want today to be over. RIGHT MEOW.

Down by Blink 182
they're an alright band I guess, but this is the only song I like from them.

The skin I'm In

Today I have decided on my tattoo. YES I want this ink on my body the rest of my life. It will be on my inner right ankle/foot. I will have a saying going accross the side of my foot saying "ádh mór ort" The meaning of this saying is Good Luck in Irish. I will be putting a small shamrock at the inner ankle which I want to look something like this picture. Somthing similar. It is really really cool looking dont you agree? If you dont... well I dont really care. I like it. It is perfect for me, it will remind me that my life is going to hand me cards, and it is going to be luck on my side I can only hope for good luck. I think I am a pretty lucky girl right about now though :) The expected date for this tattoo will be some time in december, hopfully the week or so before christmas but I am going to have to do it on a friday or saturday, so I have sunday to let the scabbing. It is going to HURT if I have to work on my feet with this right after it gets done... OUCH. My room mate Becca and I will decide because we are getting tattoos together. I am quite excited. YAY.

The skin I'm in by Gavin Rossdale. Gavin has an incredible voice. I could listen to his cd's all night long and fall asleep to his sweet raspy voice!

Rumors

This is me and Amanda-lyn my married best friend, and this was before going to kylis wedding.

I am - Happy from a good day of working =)

I want - Febuary to come faster! I miss him

I hear - My room mates talking ... that is all

I never - believe things people tell me, I take everyones excuses as a lie to get out of doing anything

I wonder - If I play the guitar more that lyrics will just come to me?

I always - work, sleep, and eat.

I usually - have a very short temper, say something wrong and watch your head get bitten off :)

I search - for meaning in life, religion, and basically everything I do, I search for the reason why.

I am not - as girly as you might think, I am a metalhead, I dont cry, and I am basically one of the boys because I cant stand the estrogin for more then an hour a day!

I dance - as much as I can, I LOVE doing hip hop dances, and lyrical.

I sing - alone in my car, people probably stare at me and think I am crazy!

I wish - I would live happily ever after, but that doesnt exist... so I wish for a old 65 fast back mustang for christmas cherry red!

I dislike - girls who act all like "OMG i broke a NAIL" And people who dont clean up after themselves

I rarely - think about my own needs

I cry -ed when my dog had to be put down, I had that pup for 10 years, which is a long time in dog years.

I am not always - nice, when people first meet me they think (B*TCH) but I just says it how I sees it and no one quite gets that in utah valley

I lose - my temper quickly... its a bad habit

I fear - that I will be the crazy cat lady one day! :( Please dont let that happen to me friends.

I'm confused - when it comes to women, if they said what was on their mind, there would be no confusion.

I need - MOOORE MONEY!!! I just like the smell of it

I should - Clean my room, and write david a letter....I MISS HIM

I dream - of living in a world of acceptance, that wont happen ever!

I have - my whole life ahead of me, what to do what to do?

I love -my family! they are so much fun and I miss haning out with them when I have to work :( boo

**I tag anybody who wants to do this. It was pretty fun.**

HA now that that is done, I had an excellent day today at work and made a butt-load of moneys!!! YAY. I realized I have some great friends today, and some great people I work with. I enjoy my job, but not enough to keep being happy about it all the time. My days are pickin up again. I think I have been crummy like all week because I hate the weather, SERIOUSLY folks when It is gloomy out side that is when I get depressed, good thing there is tanning so I can get my happy rays! It is basically like my drug and I can get my fix off of tanning and I will be good for a week. ANYWAYS. No contact from marine for a week (fetch this sucks) I do miss him a lot and I hope he knows that. He should have my letters I sent to him by now. I wonder if he is doing ok? I am wondering where he is though, sad day for that. I have decided I dislike all people who judge anyone before knowing people. I have to go to work tomorrow, so I am hittin the hay! Which is for horses. haha NIGHT

rumors by waking ashland. I like this band and I figured it tied into the mini schpill on my life that I wrote, check out waking ashland!!

I get it.

sorry I forgot you were perfect. My bad My bad.

why do people make fun of other people, or put them down? why do they think that will help. I apologies I have sinned. I am going to be better and NOT talk about people anymore. I am DONE. I have no reason to even talk about anyone behind their back. YA some people may be damn annoying and all you want to do is punch them in the FACE, but since you cant or you shouldnt, you talk about them, "like oh my gosh he is such a creeper" or "i cannot believe she would do that." I am done being that girl that you know is gonna drop gossip at a drop of a hatch. YA I know I have already YA YA YA, but those who have not sinned cast the first stone.
I have no reason why I have been so moody, grumpy, bitchy, whatever word you would like to use....but it is stopping RIGHT NOW.
I need to focus on the positive of everything, AND everyone.

Today was a good day, I went to Dave's parents house and hung out for like an hour or so. His family is so cool. They are so chill and just a very friendly bunch to be around. I like them.I showed them the present Davie sent me from JAPLAND. I could marry into that...haha um.. yeah I dont see that happening right now, but WHO KNOWS. Like in my last post WHO KNOWS!

I get it by chevelle, I am pretty sure this song is kind of sarcastic when you listen to it. Basically it is a whatever song and ya ya I get it your perfect what was I thinking kind of song.

It isnt me

If you have noticed this glazed over look in my eyes lately. It is because I have been thinking. (thinking is not one of my strong points.) I just dont know how my life is going to end up. I hate thinking that one day Im going to marry the man of my dreams and live happily ever after, but I dont think life works out that way. Look at my parents, accidental child divorced a year later but still happyily together (life partners they call it) But there are others that are married for 10 years or so and they are divorced. How does this happen? I need to know that a couple can be together forever. Yes there are going to be differences, but how do you surpass that? How do you just get over differences. I, I wish I understood. I know I have a marine, and I L word him, I wouldnt be waiting if I didnt. But what if we grow apart... I cant stop thinking about all these silly little things. I need something to focus on so I can just stop worring. I cannot wait to start school again. I bet you it will be great to be back in school. I just wish I could have afforded it while I was moved out. I am just having one of those moments on ... where is my life going and what if it doesnt go how I wish it to go? Seriously who knows what is GOING to happen, but I want there to be some security in my choices for the rest of my life. I have no control right now and it is kinda freaking me out. I need some security and happiness. I want my mom.

It isnt me by The Color Fred
The color fred started with one of the guitarists from taking back sunday. They're a pretty cool band and you should check them out. It isnt me to be like all wierd and wondering about the future, I usually live day to day, but I have this fairy tale thing that I think about for the future then I realize I have no control over what will happen. It isnt me.

The Patient

So I was having a wonderful day today and I was pretty pumped for work (friday is big money BIIIIIG money!) I was hopin for one awesome section (like I normally do) and I get a butt hole of a section. Which bummed me out a little bit, but my boss MANAGER 1 commented on my shirt because I bleached it out and did a crease of success. (which is a good thing for him to notice, because I want My STARS) So he said "keep it up and next time you will get your stars." I asked when that would be he said "well it could have been today but some people think your uniform isnt up to par, so keep it up. In other words MANAGER 1 brought my name up and a certain someone (manager 2) rejected it. So no stars for me. Manager 2 was just NIT PICKING. He says my pants are not black enough and he is the ONLY one saying it. Everyone else doesn't have a problem with me. And he just keeps making up these stupid lame excuses like I am not wearing blush, or enough make up, my pants are not black enough (which they are) And he just keeps fighting it. So what HE wants me to do is pay another 40 bucks to get new pants and keep up this stupid shirt and crease of success for like a month and maybe he'll throw me a bone. BUT I highly doubt that. For some reason MANAGER 2 doesnt want me to have my stars and I am so over it that I just could care less. If there is no pleasing him then why fight with him about it anymore. If he doesnt want to play fair then I will just continue doing what I am doing (aka a great job) and he can just be a bitch about it. I am done with my uniform it is up to par with all the other managers, so OH WELL.
In other news I got my late stay shift on thursday again. Thursdays are pretty busy (for the most part) So I am hopin to make some good money.
I wish I could move home, but it would cost a lot to try and put my contract up again. I am just going to have to wait it out, but I miss my mom and dad. I think that I might go hang out with them tomorrow night if they aren't doing anything special. Maybe bribe them and tell them I am going to pick up their cafe rio or something silly. Parents like when you do stuff like that. I do miss my mom a lot. Especialy as of late. I count on her to remind me to tie my shoes, I am surprised I havnt lost my head, except it is attached. I should probably try and organize my life, but it gets to hard to keep it organized. I like my life of chaos. (haha ok not soo much) I should probably work on that more.
I have a new work out buddy. JON! He really likes weight training and jazz like that and I need someone to keep me motivated. And he is a really good kid so I am hoping that he will help me. ALSO since we are going to be working out in the mornings at like 730 and schtuff like that, it should help motivate me to go to bed earlier, and maybe even eat breakfast. ( I was told that I have to) I'll keep ya updated on that. I start MONDAY!

the patient by tool
Tool is by far the most poetic bands out there. They literally kick the shit out of every band known to mankind. You should listen to it. I have to be patient with my work, and my life, and the working out thing so I thought it would fit.

Gotta be somebody

Today was a wonderful day. Worked out, tanning, then home to do laundry and hang out with my dog while my parents go to the UTES game. (BTW utes won so still only one undefeated team in utah.) As soon as they scored the winning touchdown I get a phone call from that David kid in Korea. YA he is going to be able to contact me more there, So I wont be so completely obsessed with him on my blog when I dont get to talk. This will help.
WELL my workout plan is going well so far since i started on tuesday. I should be on track for tomorrow and on saturday I will go right after work, and NO pasta from the B.O Just some salad. (rabbit food) I am going to try and wake up early to go running but I dunno if I am gonna make it EARLY early, just like 12 or 1 in the afternoon or something. PURTY exciting day.
So This picture is to show that the UTES is Where it is at B*tches!
10 and 0 for their season so far. I have faith that they can keep this up! LIKE HELL YES they can. =)
Just pray for them.










Gotta be somebody by nickelback is from their newest album. Listen to it... love it. I know you will

sitting, waiting, wishing

It was so lovely not having to work Tuesday, but I think I need work. It keeps my mind busy and sane. HA. I did get some stuff done though, including go to cafe rio, which is always amazing, but yesterday the guy doing the beginning part of my order was "ein Dumkopf." When I said Pork Burrito he said "oh hungry are we?" I just said ... "yeah" He asked black or pinto beans I said both. He asked again. I said both. Then Proceeded to put only one of them in, black if you must know. Then he said Mild Medium or Hot. I said HOT. He put Mild in, and looked at me. I said HOT! and THEN he put in HOT sauce. Like I didnt even notice him doing it. Then he says Enchlada style? I said YES he said NO SAUCE? I said NO I WANT..... he cut me off, put cheese on it and put it in the oven thingy. I was in shock. Was he deaf? Im not 100 percent sure. He got my friends order right, so maybe he just hated me. (who knows) Didnt taste bad or anything, I just like it MY WAY.
Im very used to having things MY way, because being an only child gives a lot of room for just my way. Which is how I like it. I feel bad for my future husband. He is gonna have to put up with me. But I think he'll be ok. (lets pray for that.)
I have been thinking of going to another church again sunday. I went to a Presbyterian church a couple sundays ago, and I LOVED it. Maybe it was the bag pipes playing, Or it was just the talk the pastor gave. I felt like I had an actual spiritual moment. Which is rare and far between when I actually have those.
I am so excited to hear from Dave, Soon hopefully. I have not recieved a call yet, but I should be I hope. Im prayin for that too. But Not too much longer until I can talk to him on the computer again, and Febuary is not too far away either! eeek :)
I miss my momma and my dad. I thought I would just LOVE living on my own, and dont get me wrong I love the freedome and the being responsible for myself, but I love having them as my company. They always make me laugh and keep me entertained for the most part. Im gonna go visit my mommy tomorrow morning before she takes off for the UTES game!!!
I am hopin and wishin that the UTES win this game (oh please oh please) I cannot take the ridicule from work if they loose. When BYU already lost to the team they are going to be playing(hehe) I still think it is so funny their quest is over.
Back to my parents. They look pretty young ay? They're hot. I have some good genes for me when I get old. Bwahahaha. Hmm notice any resemblence, because I dont see how I am related. Look at that blondie with the burnettes, I am definetally fed ex.
I am still waiting. Patiently for my life to start, I think febuary will give me an idea on where to begin! ;)

sitting waiting wishing by jack johnson is an AMAZING song. This particular song relates to the fact that I am waiting for my life to finally start and a phone call.

Your call

Waiting for your call I'm sick, call I'm angry, call I'm desperate for your voice.
I had work today (oh joy) Love the monday night free rootbeer let me tell you. (BLEH) that was me vomiting. HAHA It sucked it was super busy and I barley made 10 bucks an hour... more like 8 or 9 bucks an hour. It is still really good, but lately on mondays I have been making more then 100 bucks a night which is AWESOME! No big deal though I will have better days obviously, and sometimes worse days. People are just annoying. I am getting so burnt out from work. OH so where I was going with this blog is I get to work at 4 and get a phone call at 5 but it was just my momma, so I ignored it because I was working. The next vibration was from a text that says "answer your phone it's dave" so I freaked, I had several theorys. A: Something bad happened and his mom called my mom and she wanted to tell me right then. B: Dave some reason had my dads phone (not likely) or something along those lines like they could transfer a call (even though I dont think that is possible) Anyways I went downstairs to the "bathroom" to call my mom back , and she said Dave called her house, looking for me, and then asked for my number. SO time for the waiting game. I am hoping for some kind of contact tonight, well desperatly PRAYING for some kind of contact. Would that not just be the most amazing thing to happen today. I miss that bugger. I would love to just talk to him for at least a minute. I am so happy to know he is thinking of me though. Even if he DID forget my phone number, but he has more important things going on obviously.
I miss him so much it hurts. I just want to see him. Talk, just about anything. I can't take this distance anymore. I wish he could just hear my thoughts and call me!
"I just want my phone call" the joker from the Dark Knight
I am excited for tomorrow NO SERVITUTE! YAY i hate my job! =D
Ha ha no I don't hate it but when you work EVERY stinkin day, you become very very very burnt out of stupid people that come in. I could literally write a book on things that people do that irritate me, funny things they say, stupid things they say, funny things they do, stupid things they do, how I dislike when they shake their glass at me to show its empty, how they ask for straws, when they tell you how to do your job, when they say they know how things on the menu are supposed to work and I obviously havnt worked at the B.O. Long enough. HAHA like I said I could go on and on and ON. I wont bore you to death with my blog though.
I was thinking today. Febuary isnt too far away (crap) I want to look dead sexy when that particular month rolls around (no reason :) :) :) I am wanting to loose 10 lbs. So tomorrow is going to be the start of my work out plan and sligtly altered diet. Trust me I am going to be eating whatever I want but in much smaller portions, and I will no longer drink caffine, or other gross sugary drinks. Im sticking to this, this time. I need to.
Semper
Your call by Secondhand Serenade. I love love LOVE secondhand serenade, one of my favorite bands. This particual song is me um... waiting for... his ... call.... SOON!!!!
Im praying that I will get one, Im desperate for his voice!

You might have noticed

Dear friends, I have made a new blog. I couldn't figure out how to fix my old blog to make it look cute (as it finally is.) So Welcome to my new blog! I am so excited about the first post today. I have some exciting news about my day today. I picked up a couple letters from Dave's friends/my friends, that I am sending to him. I am so excited to send it to him, because I think that will make his day. (as soon as he gets it in like 2 weeks!) I went to visit my fam today. First my grandparents, because my grandpa had surgery on his knee caps for artheritis. He wasn't doin so well :( Makes me sad to see him like that.

I went and picked up a letter from Miker and from Quotah. Then I hung out with my mommy and daddy. I miss hanging out with them just on sundays. I regret ever wanted to leave and not hang out with them when I lived there. I miss just bein around them.
So anyways NEW BLOG. I am really sad about my old one but I couldn't figure out a way to fix it to normal even I messed with the settings and I couldn't do anything but make the background white. So there you go!

Latest news from Dave: He is heading for Korea unless he is already there. He will be there for like 27 days or so, and then he will go back to Japan until January then he supposibly will be back in Camp Pendelton and then in Febuary he will be HOME for 3 weeks. =D
I had a good meeting with my roommates today. I am hoping this will help a lot. Because I am not liking being moved out. I am just lonely, miserable, and grossed out by being in my apartment. I do not even approve of people being in our apartment because it is so nasty. I am embarressed! So I am hoping this will be better.
Halloween came and went so fast it was crazy that Halloween is already over! I have some great pictures of me and a couple of my room mates and some people from work.
I will be continueing how I had my older blog and stick with a song that relates to my feelings for the day. Today the song you might have noticed is by the academy is.. They're an awesome band I belive you should check them out if you havent. The song title should be self explanitory the fact that I erased my old blog and made a new one is the you might have noticed. Hope you continue to read!