movin on up

well... friends I think I created a new blog... ya know... with my husband..... and our life.... being married... ya get the idea... please follow me now on
married blog :)


LOOVER YOUUUU

Do what I gotta do.

A lot of people have been asking me "how's married life treating ya?" Well I'm here to tell you as of 23 hundred hours it's not as fabulous as I always hoped it would be. Know why? I feel crazy in LOVE with a United States Marine. I have been married a little over a week and I only got to spend about four full days with my husband. I wish that I could just get out there and be with him right now, but I can't I guess it's a longer process then I expected. I would move out there and live in a box til we got set up. I just want to see that crazy marine husband of mine. I AM thankfully able to talk to him and that is nice to be able to have at least that. He's not deployed yet. Thank GOD. But that's going to be the hardest thing to do when that time comes.... thankfully that wont be for a while and I get to be with my husband for a good half a year before the dreaded day comes.
How's married life? I miss my husband. I know that I will be exercising a lot of patients over these next two years but I honest to god would not have had it any other way. I made the right decision and I want to sit on the same side of the booth with him in every restaurant I go to til forever. I want to hold hands and kiss like no one is watching in the middle of a crowded room til forever. I want to take all goofy jokes he makes about me and smile cause he is saying things cause he is in love with me back. He makes me so happy even when he is 700 miles away. I love my Marine and I'm proud to be his wife. I will do everything and anything to make this work and last and be happy and make him as happy as he can. Because HE is the strongest person I know and I know that he deserves all of what I can give him plus more. I'll only put mayo in his socks when I am really really mad at him. (hehe just kidding I'll probably never do that.)
On another note I'm working a butt load again and I will be saving up to move out there, and its my last week in my apartment. SO LONG NUMBER 12. Where its @ is moving to spanish fork til I can move to San Diego also known as the whales vagina! JK.
I also had kind of a going away party for me tonight with loads of ice cream. I was hoping more people could make it but the only ones who mattered where (IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER) Abbie, Bethany, and Kayla. Those three are my favorites ever in the whole world and I am so so happy to have all of them in my life right now, especially when they snuggle me while my husband is away. Just to have a good friend that I can count on is so so meaningful. I can say I have never had a girl bestfriend in my life until now. LITTLE LATE GIRLS (hehe) I still love you all. Thanks for coming and I'll be back to visit after I move away. ONLY to come see you of course :)
I am very happy with my life and the people in it. I hope it can stay this way forever. And three days in David's case. ;)

Do what I gotta do by john legend. I love this mans voice and I am doing what I gotta do to be with my lover face.

Blue

**If you have a weak stomach please don't read**
So today I feel like I'm blue in the face cause I been choking down pill after pill today. I am currently taking 4 pills a day, but it's the same pill so it only counts as one but the pill is bigger than my thumb nail. I have to choke it down with gallons of water and it still feels like it's stuck in my throat. (so LAME) If you are wondering why let me explain.
Saturday I was with my sexy hubby at his brother Scott's house watching the UFC fights and I noticed my jaw was a little tender and felt some bumps on the side of my face...well that's not good! I assumed that it was my Staph infection. I have had it since I was born and it comes back every once in a while either as a huge boil on my arm or surrounding area or a rash on my face with boil-y looking pimples. I texted my father that night asking for a medication called "bacterban" which is a gooey substance that you put on the rash and it'll get better shortly. It didn't get better if anything was getting worse and on top of that got the stomach flu. I was barfing and my jaw was swelling and getting more red by the second. My mom took me to instacare and the doctor says... well it ain't a Staph infection. ITS HERPES!!!! UGH grosss. It's just a coldsore that didn't know where to go. SUPERLAME. I found out the stuff I been using on my face actually made the herpes angry... we don't want to upset it. So he perscribed some pills that are huge that I take 4 times a day! My mom says it's looking better but I don't think it looks better it's just large and bubbly.
I told Dave that as soon as he leaves something bad will happen...needless tosay that has happened AGAIN! When he left the first time I slammed my finger in the car door NOW he left and I get herpes on my chin! UTARDED.
David I miss you and you probably shouldn't leave me any more! (jk I know I have no say in that.)

Blue by A perfect circle. I feel like I'm choking on these pills and going to turn blue.

White Wedding

Yes it's true, I have chose to devote my life to this crazy kid named David Griggs. Which is my new name since thursday April 16th. I am so happy and it went so fast that it almost is crazy to say I have a husband. But I would NOT have it any other way I want to be with him the rest of my living life and 3 days after. I have an amazing new family that are so great to me and my David. The day went really fast and the judge I thought would be kind of a tard seemed really nice at the end of it. Dave said YES twice, hehe. Dave said that the judge started talking slower and he thought he was supposed to say yes after everything so he said YES really loud and we all kind of giggled. Then we kissed and headed to his parents house for some sammiches and family time. I know I know, NO one knew when I was going to get married and half of y'all weren't invited, I'm sorry we're going to probably do a reception this summer but we'll see what we can do. I would rather get my stuff together and move out there to be with him as soon as possible. But it's all in good time.
He left this morning around 6:30 ish. Kind of sad and my eyeballs betrayed me in leaking salty, wet tears, but give me a break this is my husband now. I am glad we got married and I would NOT have it any other way. I love my marine. :)



White wedding by billie idol. Well what did you expect me to put in here :)

Right Here

I am currently waiting for my David to be in the 801 zip code. He's comin home and been driving all night (poor marine.) I can't wait to see him and I am so ver ver excited! YAY DAVEY I MISSED YOU SOO MUCH, I'll see ya soon!!!

Right here by staind and the song goes "you always find away to keep me right here waiting." I mean it in the best way possible cause that is all I can do is be patient with the marines and him :) Can't wait to see you!!!!

Closure.

Today I am thinking back to about 9 months ago. I moved into the Winterhaven apartments, and met some really radical people. Starting with Erkle. This chick is my favorite ever. I never thought I would make a best friend out of a roommate. I would love to say and play with her next year but I'm gettin all hitched and stuff. So I'll make it a plan to come visit her as often as I can manage.
And also Becca, Denise, Chelsee, and Asumi.
Becca you've been the most real person I have ever known. Nothing is held back with you and I love and appreciate that so much. You always had something to say and I usually agreed. That's what cool NON mormons do! (what what)
Denise, well my BYU friend who has a T shirt from U of U now!! OHHHH. We still need to make it up to the PIE before I deploy to be with my marine :) I could count on you to be there.
Chelsee, GIRRRRL We had some good times in this crazy #12. I hope only the best for you and your life. This apartment would not have been the same without you.
Asumi thanks for your hard work and helping when no one else was. I appreciate it so much and you stuck it out all 9 months. I think we all did ver ver well.
It's crazy to think about but it's all over... and I just realized we don't have a picture of all of us together. I'm gonna have to make sure one gets taken before we all go on our seperate ways.
I hope to stay in contact with a few of you crazy retards I call my roommates. If I don't though, just know the time with y'all has changed my perspective on life greatly. I can honestly say that 6 crazy different ladies can come from 6 different houses and live in what I'd like to call "Peace?" or "pieces" whichever comes first :)
Another new item is...
I am indeed a blonde again. I have excuses for when I park stupidly or say something retarded. It's just the roots. :)
I am preparing to move back to my parents until I can be with my lover in San Diego. As I was cleaning I found my old journal and year books. I laughed REALLY hard when I found this.
That is Dave's 9th grade photo and the writing next to it says " David Griggs, man he got hot! I am going to marry him, just kidding he has a girlfriend and that SUCKS!!!" and I would like to let you know I wrote that back in March 6, 2006. AH Is that not the funniest thing or what! I really am marrying this kid after 3 years of wanting to! Kind of funny how life works out?
If you are wondering if he is going to be able to come home next week... truth is I dunno yet :( I was hoping for tonight but seeing how I'm already writing a blog, I will probably NOT post another one later tonight. If I get confirmation I will blog right away... I honestly hope I can just see my David. I miss him a lot of bits right now. (ps is it kind of strange that I could be married by this time next week!? I'm so excited to be with him, so I'll let y'all know.)

Closure by Chevelle I was just talking about moving out of my apartment. It's been a good 9 months and I learned a lot. But I take with me my experiences, and grow from them. Thanks ladies I couldn't have done it without ya!!

For a pessimist I'm pretty optomistic

I am going to marry the man of my dreams. BE JEALOUS. So since I don't get to talk to him for about 2 weeks... I decided to write a blog about him (like I don't do that all the time anyways. This is different.) I want to tell everyone why he is perfect for me, and don't worry nothing too mushy... its semi-sweet. (Just how I like it)

Reason 1: This boy can make me laugh so hard I almost pee my pants. Not cause he tickles me or does stupid annoying things like that (ok sometimes he does do that kind of stuff) But it's not annoying to me in the least. He can just keep me laughing for hours and hours, and I miss that the most when he is gone. The marine corps puts him in a bad mood sometimes and I don't get to hear his laugh as much when it's been a shitty marine corps day. I do know how to get him to laugh back though, and THAT my friends is the reason he has kept me interested in his goofy self all these long years. Even when I just am texting him he will say something so funny that I can almost picture him saying it and laugh out loud to a text message. Yep, he is just that good.

Reason 2: I know most women LOOOVE to be romanced and all that girly stuff. I am not a traditional girl who needs flowers on her doorstep and I am pretty practical when it comes to things like this. Dave is SEMI sweet. He know's what to say to me to make me feel so special without being overboard with it. (EXAMPLE: you are the moon, the sun, the starlit sky. Without you I'd dwell in darkness.) DAVEY does not do this and I LOVE THIS ABOUT HIM. We are both pretty practical about things and we know we're in love, we don't need all the sweetness... just enough. =)

Reason 3: Ummmm have you SEEN my fiance. He's a hottie. The marine corps is NOT full of hot men with big massive weapons and guns and sexy tan bodies... no not at all. BUT Dave is smokin hot! I got lucky with this, I'd like him even if he gained 12.3 lbs. :) It's not all about looks but it's very nice to have a hot man in my life, so everyone can stare and be like "damn what's that crazy burnette chick doin with that hot marine?"

Reason 4: We like doing the same things. I cannot wait to go hiking and hit up Moab and go to all these fun places with him. We took the same German class and decided that one day we shall go to Germany to speak what little German we know to get us some German BIER!!! (that's German for BEER.) When in Germany YOU HAVE TO TRY BEER. It's only natural. We will also most likely go deep sea fishing while we are living in San Diego. I have been fishing before and I don't mind the fishing part as long as someone wants to bait my hook :D But I loath fish, they're to squishy and smell awful. I will not touch the fish, but knowing Dave he'll probably make me kiss it or something nasty and I'll get over it eventually.

Reason 5: We can literally talk about anything. I have known this boy for so long now, we have a lot of the same friends and have grown up living 3 blocks away for 6 years. He was in my ward so we can make fun of the old ward together. We hung out a lot and knew every person we ever dated other than eachother. And for some reason we always stayed friends, even when we broke up we would always still hang out as friends. (probably cause I still had a huge crush on the rascal, but I was too nervous to say anything to him about it.) The fact is that now that we know so much about each other, most topics are an open book. There are things I'm still getting to know about him and vice versa, but I will take the good with the bad.

Reason 6: We have similar taste in music. I blame David for most of this. I used to think that Dave was crazy for getting a tattoo of TOOL on his arm. It is his peragative though, who am I to judge what he does. He told me to listen to this song by Tool called the patient. I thought sure why not, I kind of have a huge crush on him so I will see what he likes them so much for. Anyways needless to say I am now a fan of them. Since then my taste in music has opened up to that style and I am a huge fan of APC. Which tool's lead singer is also in. Breaking Benjamin, Rob Zombie, Godsmack, and others like that we are both into. I'm just sayin next time Tool comes to concert I am going! Or A perfect circle, I'd go to them before Tool. Sorry Dave.

Reason 7: I like that we aren't the same at all. He likes nasty tang and zip Miracle whip and I love Mayo. It's kind of a joke I usually send him pictures of me flipping off the miracle whip now and he things he's going to put mayo in my socks one day. We just have these little inside jokes now. I love it.

Reason 8: He's pretty easy going. Doesn't get mad often and I honestly have never got into a fight with him. Which is good we don't have any reason to fight about anything. I know one day we'll get into a fight, but its nothing we can't calm down and talk about things later. I'm pretty easy going and I am fairly reasonable when it comes to things. There is always a compromise and picking battles is probably the key to anything. Why fight about something as stupid as what movie to get, or what carpet to put in or (i dunno what do old married couples fight about.) I just love that we're both pretty level headed that it should never be a problem with us.

Reason 9: We have some awesome families. I love his family and my family loves him. I can't speak for him but I'm pretty sure that he likes my family. If not me and my family are a package deal and he's just putting up with them for me. (I know that he likes me =D ) Both of our families are ver ver excited for us. Which is SOOOOOO good. I have dealt with past relationships that my parents don't like him and as you can tell... it didn't work out. AND with good reason.

Reason 10: He gets me. I am a total spaz at times, and he is too. I know he's just going to get wierder with the time spent with him, and I know I'll probably get crazier. (thanks mom) He know's that too, he's seen my mom first hand and we are both aware that I might get slightly crazy. He's just going to get frutier. I know this and expect him one day to push me out of bed cause I stole the blanket, Or I might really find mayo in my sock one day. I'll probably put mayo on his sammich one day just to spite him. :) We just can have fun with what we have to work with. We will just deal with out personal problems and make fun of eachother for it.

I could absolutly keep going and tell you everything I love about this kid right down to his eyelashes. I won't keep ranting though. I have a lot of inside jokes in a lot of these reasons that he will only understand and most might not. It's nice to think about these great memories that I had with him, and more to come soon.

Dave, wherever you might be right now. Know that you're on my mind and that's the way it'll be til forever and 3 days are up. Love you crazy tard nugget.

For a pessimist I'm pretty optomistic by paramore. I thought it was ironic. Like myself. :)

SAVE ME

I am venting today. (because today offically sucks)
I absoulutly LOATH my job. People do NOT tip as well as they should which makes me upset and my tables can probably tell and that prolly takes away from my tip too. Seriously people have been leaving 10 percent or less unless their bill is under 20 then people leave like 20 percent but big deal 4 dollars per table that stay there for an hour and I work about 6 to 7 hours... lets just say it's not too fabulous to be a waitress in utah right now. I should be thankful that I even have a job and I am pretty grateful, but the way I make my money is with tips and people are not even being fair. It's miserable at work.
I miss him so much. It is positively miserable being without him at all. I am ready to go to Vegas and elope. Just so I can spend more time with him instead of being without him. I know for a fact that I can only be with him for the rest of my life because I have NEVER EVER been this upset about being away from anyone. Even with my own parents I don't get this feeling of empty aloneness. It literally breaks my heart just thinking that I don't get to fall asleep with him, or even not get to talk to him at night. (ps i'm sorry if you think i'm just being a whiny baby about this but I have literally never been so alone in my whole life, I love him. what can i say?) I know I'm being a baby and I know I can be tougher than this, I'll be ok, I just need to get out of my apartment..... which leads me to,
My roommates are all gone. Chelsee and Asumi are still home, but I haven't seen hide or hair of either of them. I am very very VERY alone. I miss erkle and denise and becca. I wish they would come home and play games with me and dance in the halls with me. I think that would help my mind not be so sad about my David being so far away.
I have a lot of bills and they're not getting paid because people aren't tipping me well at work. Which is not good because I might be getting married sooner rather than later and I need to pay for a ring and ... well I dunno what else we are going to be doing but. We will see.
Anyways my day sucked cause I had to work, and I have to go to work, I didn't get to talk to my Davey today, (not alot anyways and my hell do I miss this kid so much or what) I did get to see my future family in law for his older sisters birthday, which was nice to see them and talk wedding stuff. I went home and talked to my Mom, now I'm back in my most lonely of apartments. I have work tomorrow morning and double shift thursday. (BLAHHHHH)
Everyone needs a venting blog. I hope I didn't irritate those of you reading to death.

save me by alter bridge ... does this need an explination???

You and Me.

I just got home from San Diego last night. I'll let ya know how my trip went.
Friday Morning, My grandma is late my mom wants to punch her. They were all going with me to the airport. I havn't flown since I was like 7 years old and I was a little intimidated by going through security. I got there and was just fine, I was on a standby pass to get out there. If you don't know what a standby pass is its you waiting to see if there is going to be a spot for you on the plane. It looked good about 20 minutes before they were boarding then all of a sudden they are looking for someone to transfer to a different plane. It got oversold and it didn't look like I was going to get on. I was in a panic. I didn't want to change flight but I would if I absolutly had to, not that I had a choice if this went badly. At the very last minute the lady called me forward and said "today is your lucky day miss, you better run its the very last one on the right outside." AHH I booked it in flip flops with two very full bags that didn't have wheels on them. I got there just in time and sat by a very nice man from Scotland. He was awesome and had the coolest accent EVER! He helped me with my bag and put it in for me. He was talking about Spanish Fork and I told him that's where I was from. It was cool to talk to him. I flew into Longbeach Airport. It was such a small airport which didn't intimidate me as badly. I turned on my phone and listened to my messages. Dave just had called me and said he was off work and showering and he would be there as soon as possible. I sat at the airport for a little less than an hour, until Dave's car pulled up. I got to see his base that day. I was informed that I better hope that no one important doesnt see me with a belt on. I could get banned from base if I dont have a belt on when I am in base. Apparently not having a belt is NOT proper civilian attiar. (haha ohh the marines) It was cool to see, I didn't expect it to be like an actual city but it was very cool. I met Dave's friend Paul Simpson (aka: pimpson.) We went and got a hotel which was very nice, in a city right outside of base called San Clemente. It was cute, and close by. After we got the hotel set up we went out to eat at a burger place which was pretty good. He asked what I wanted to do after I said I dont care we could go down to the beach or the hotel, he said, lets go to the beach. (I should have seen this one comin) We were down by the ocean and the tide came up a little higher than we both though and it got in his shoes, and his socks. HA I was laughing at him when he said I gotta check my shoes, he bent down, on one knee... and held my hands and said "Heather Hill, will you marry me?" AH YES PLEASE. I didn't see it comin, I mean I knew it was going to but I didn't think it would be just then. I said YES don't you worry and we sort of made out on the beach a lot lot lot. But I can do that now I have a fiance. We snuggled a lot while I was down there, Played on the beach. We ate at this really good restaurant at Dana Point. It's called Proud Mary's. If you are ever in the area go there, it's awesome. We drove out to Old Town. Walked around and bought some taffy for my aunt who is in love with it. We mostly just snuggled a lot. It was so awesome to get to be with him and the weekend went by way too fast. But I'm engaged now to this awesome man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. Friend's I'll keep you updated on when a day might be. I'll find out maybe at the end of this month or the beginning of April,(I have to share my life with the marine corps for 2 and a half more years) and I am starting plans for a wedding. If you have any idea's that you think would be helpful PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE throw them at me I'm accepting of all ideas and I don't know what the heck I'm doing anyways. So let me know.

You and Me by Lifehouse, that's it You and Me davey forever plus 3 days.

Daydreamer.

Today is a random post. Today I was daydreaming at work about how nice San Diego was going to be. I was day dreaming about hanging out with a boy all weekend long, and how nice it would be to fall asleep next to him... of course he would be on the floor and I will be in the bed. I daydreamed about having unlimited amounts of money, and what I would buy with it. I would buy a home, and stuff to put in it... and a new car, and cool things for my car like tint for the windows and make the muffler loud and cool like my car. I daydreamed about slapping someone in the face for being really stupid at work. I daydreamed about eating homemade bread with butter. I daydreamed how it would be so awesome to be a rockstar that toured the country. I would LOVE to get paid to travel. I daydreamed that I would pie my manager before I quit. I daydreamed that I would have no fear in my life, how it would be so nice to not be afraid of anything. I was mostly thinking about bugs. I think there is a bug in my room... I hope it dies before I find it so I won't be so grossed out. I daydream about clear perfect skin. How awesome would it be to just throw some blush on and eyeliner and mascara, I wish I had that luxury. I daydreamed about telling a few people off for how they treated me in the past. I daydreamed about falling asleep at a decent time, because I haven't fallen asleep earlier than 2 in the morning since Feb 16. I don't understand why myself actually.
I want everyone to know I only day dreamed of these things today. Mostlly while I was at work, but I wasn't all there at work today. I will try and go to bed earlier... with the help of sleeping aids. YAY

Daydreamer by Michael Kelsey
seriously check this guy out I LOVE his music. do it... do it.... do it!!!!

Fall For You.

I would just like to inform everyone how incredibly awesome my life is. I couldn't be happier... well yeah I could. (if I had 100 billion dollars, and my david all to myself right now instead of the marine corps owning his soul. but lets be practical here.) I have an amazing family who is so supportive of anything I have or will do. I have some real good friends I work with and live with. I have a smokin hot boyfriend who I really really really really really really really really like. My whole family likes him too. And I was so happy today, it almost brought me to tears. (happy tears) Like wow, things all fit into place. It's a really nice feeling.
Also I want everyone to know MY BIRTHDAY is this sunday. So I will be another year older... I don't really care about my birthday lately, but it's my birthday and it's a pretty big freaking deal. I am turning twenty for goodness sakes. So yeah mark your calenders, set an alarm, whatever just remember me on my day of birth.

Fall for you by secondhand serenade. Mostly just talking about that dave kid.

Breaking the habit.

I find myself much more lazy than I should be. I really need to be more active. Especially cause I am going to Moab this April and I want to be able to hike without getting tired and sore before everyone else. I absolutly LOVE hiking and seeing all this stuff but my body is in some horrible shape and gets very tired quickly. I do not want this to happen anymore. I am very excited for Moab. Its one of my favorite places, especially seeing the cool arches. Last time we went I didn't see Delicate Arch. I need to see that one this next time I go.
It is almost my birthday. Well actually I celebrate the whole month as my birthday, hehe but the 8th of march was the actual date of birth. I was premature and I was like the size of a magazine when I was born. I only weighed 4 and some odd ounces. I was a tiny little thing. Look at the big kid I am now :) I will be 20 years old, and no longer a teenager. Kind of crazy to think about that I have been alive for 20 years. I am gonna be thinking that again as soon as I turn 30. Woah that will be crazy. I am pretty excited though I enjoy having a family party like we always do. And my parents are going to take me out to dinner... YUM.
Another little thing I am excited about is flying to San Diego to see my David. It will probably be the weekend after my birthday, and I hope everything works out. I mean no one really know's cause his job is kind of unpredictable. But hopefully. Hope for the best expect the worse right?
Only a few more months til I can move out =D I know that's horrible of me to think cause this has been a fun experience and I like setting my own rules and doing things my own way and paying for myself. But I just want to go home now. I am so ready to hang out with my parents, who actually like me and help with keeping the house clean and doing stuff like that. They're pretty nice people, so I am excited.
Anyways I hope that I will be able to stay active, I will be working out at least 3 times a week ... at the least. I will break this habit :)

Breaking the habit by linkin park. I really like this band and pretty self explanitory

Weak and Powerless

Tillin my own grave to keep me level. Jam another dragon down the hole.
So weak and powerless, over you.

I have been having trouble with my laptop lately, like it tries to block certain websites, like myspace. Except that I don't want it blocked. Well it is also trying to block hotmail and I have to check my email so I unblock it, NOW it is blocking my msn messenger. I can't figure out how to unblock that though. So currently do not have messenger. The only reason I use it is to talk to Dave and he has a phone now, so I won't worry too much, but still GRR it blows.
I saw confessions of a shopaholic tonight with Denise. I spilled popcorn on her, and MOVIES ARE EXPENSIVE. BLAH!!! I am just going to buy a movie for 15 bucks instead of watching it one time in a theater for like 8 or 9 bucks. What is the world coming to if movies one time are 8.75$ That's just craziness.
I never said what I got for valentines day. NOT that valentines day is really a big deal, personally I can show how much I love someone any day of the week, or month, or year. So it's just a waste of a holiday. HOWEVER, I got some gourmet pop corn from the grandparents, an Itunes card from my mother, which I plan on buying a movie with it. OH and a promise ring from David. It was a pretty good day. But like I said, that stuff could have happened any other day and it would have been just the same.
I really miss that boy. I feel like I am a broken record that keeps saying it over and over and over, but I feel so alone. The day he left I watched him drive away. It was the hardest thing I ever had to endure. It hurts my heart to just think about it. I miss talking to him, snuggles, kisses, etc. I know I gotta be strong and try not to let it affect me. But it is really hard, he is one of my best good friends, and while he was home it felt... good. NO not good, GREAT. Everything fit where it was supposed to and I have never been happier. Now that he is gone, that piece of me is missing and I don't feel whole anymore.
I hope I get to go out there soon like ... may or june... something around there. I really want to see him again soon.
I also realized that I don't have many girl friends. I am gonna go into UVU again soon, and get going on some financial aid junk, to get back into school for the fall semester. I am going to work all summer to save some cash, and when fall comes I will be a full time student again, with a part time job. Only 2 shifts or so a week. I am really looking forward to that and getting back into some sort of a structure for my life. Which I have been lacking in. When I don't have structure I just make bad decisions... something like that. I just miss school actually. YA I KNOW I am crazy. Back in high school I would start a countdown to school like a month and a half early. (hehe) YEAH I am slightly nerd like, but I'm good looking so it's ok.
Here is something you probably didn't know about me. I watch Shrek more than any other movie ever. I mostly watch Shrek when I am sad, upset, lonely, or just in some crummy mood. It makes me happy to watch. Dragon is my favorite of course. But I have been watching it once every night since monday. I think this will be a nightly ritual for a couple more weeks. We will see.

weak and powerless by APC. A perfect circle is one of my favorite bands, and this song sort of discribes how I am feeling lately.

wish you were here

Dave left yesterday =(
It was a really sad day and i had to work that night which was really good cause I had something to do. I did go to lunch with Kayla, I called her sad. Then we went to the mall. I got off work really sad and i was leaking a little....well lot. And then it happened, I slammed my pointer finger in the car door... I pulled and it wouldn't come out I had to find my keys and unlock my car to get my finger out of the door. I was really really sad. It hurt. Now I have a cold.
It's offical this week sucks.

wish you were here by pink floyd
I wish david was here. I miss him :(

Making memories of us

IN YOUR SENIOR YEAR DID YOU...

1. Did you date someone from your school? yes all sophomore year and all senior year with one person. 2 different people. I wish I would have dated more.

2. Did you marry someone from your high school? Not yet.

3.Did you car pool to school? Sophomore year Zac would pick me up with Colby or Colby would pick me up. Until I got a boyfriend

4.What kind of car did you have? I have a 99 ford escort still :) I love jennifer.

5.What kind of car do you have now? Same one she's been a good lil car.

6. Its Saturday night now you're...... working...

7. It is Saturday night then you're..... homework, working or i had a boyfriend

8.What kind of job did you have in high school? I worked at Dominos Pizza. I loved working there

9. What kind of job do you do now? I'm a server at Brick Oven. Can't escape the pizza

10.Were you a party animal? ...yeah not really

11. Were you considered a flirt? YES i was

12. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? None. I tried not to go to school a lot... and i danced.

13.Were you a nerd? no I did everything in my power to not get strait A's

14.Did you get suspended or expelled? I got in school suspension one time. But the other kid deserved what he got.

15.Can you sing the fight song? um NOPE. I didn't have much school spirit.

16. Who was/were your favorite teacher(s)? Ms. Griffen. She is my idol.

17.Where did you sit during lunch? I never ate in the lunch room. I always went somewhere else

18.What was your school's full name? Spanish Fork High School

19.When did you graduate? 2007

20.What was your school mascot? The Dons. If you don't know what a don is.... well it's like Zorro so it's BAD ASS

21. If you could go back and do it again, would you? YES, Life was so simple back then I would re do everything.

22.Did you have fun at Prom? haha from what I remember it was a grand ole time.

23.Do you still talk to the person you went to Prom with? Um... nope, it's complicated.

24. Are you planning on going to your next reunion? YES i need to be the best looking there.

25. Do you still talk to people from school? YEAH!

26.School Colors? Red Grey and White

27.What celebrities came from your high school? umm... let me think ... ME

Now, I tag....

Megan, Sam, Janelle, Jon, Janna, Mari, Kristen, and BETHIE.

Making memories of us by Keith urban.
As much as I dislike country, this particular song really does bring back memories, some good some bad, but all in all they were memories I'll never forget.

So Close.

I never expected to be where I am. Until I got here.
I am so happy with my life, and how everything is going in my world. All because of him. Well MOSTLY. I am very happy with how my life is... now just to get into school again. THIS FALL! I also would like everyone to know we as in our apartment passed cleaning checks. (thankyouverymuch) I would also like everyone to know the christmas tree is STILL UP!!! SOMEONE said it would be gone by thursday... well thursday has come and gone and its still here. :) I guess all I can do is smile and burn it down, but my room is clean and I am not leaving my window open in the winter time anymore. I get the sniffles :(
I need to start running again....
anyways David leaves this monday :( boo. So if you are my friend don't bring it up on monday I will still be sad. Just talk to me about other random things. Or buy me a cookie =D JUSSST KIDDDDDING.
Although Abbie DID share her cookie dough and it was AMAZING. Brickoven has cookies that are huge gynormous and they taste delicious, and they are now selling cookie dough. AND I LOVE IT!!!!!!!
I can't wait to move home with my mom. She for valentines day is going up to the utes basketball game. I hope that it isn't too snowy to drive up there, because my father took off to San Fran for the week to do some work up there, and my mom is all alone. (its her fault for only having one child) I still have gone to visit her the last couple of days. I don't want her to be too lonely. But for valentines she bought those tickets for her and my dad to go and then he said he was leaving and she was sad. My cousin MAK can go with but they can't if its too snowy to drive in. So I'm hoping for her happiness that she can go.
I love this kid... named david.

OK BYE

so close by jon mclaughlin. If you havn't heard this song you NEED TO. It kind of discribes how I feel like... riight, NOW.

Everything Changes

Hello friends.
I have changed my blog again. When I am feeling like in a rut and my life needs a change I can usually change something very inconspicuous and small and be okay. Today it was my blog. I am proud to say I took that picture on my blog. It's just a trail my dogs made by running on it for a real long time. Anyways. I am still vur vur happy. I am planning on burning down my roommates fake tree in our apartment. (because it is still up. you would want to too) I am going home today.


Everything Changes by Staind. I love this band, and this song says a little something about how I changed everything up.

shadow of the day..

Who hate's taxes? I hate taxes. I don't wanna talk about it anymore.
I decided If I could have one super power I would want to read minds. I would like to know what people are really thinking when something is said to them. Or just anything at all. Maybe I'm just being a bit paranoid but I just wish I could read minds and figure out what people are really thinking. That's all

Shadow of the day by Linkin park. The shadow of the day is TAXES =(

Must have done something right

Must have done something right by relient K
cause I must have to have got so lucky... oh hell that was cheesy!

Remember to breath

DAVE IS HOME! AH it is awesome. I suppose I'll start at the beginning.
Tuesday seemed like a promising day enough riiight? Well I finished cleaning my room and headed out to go to my ONE YEAR mark free food lunch in for the BO. I was already anxious enough as it was cause he was coming home at 9 at night. I hardly ate then I get a phone call from DAVE. Naturally I am extatic I answer and he says HEYYYY I'm comin in at 6 instead of 9!!! ah YES PLEASE. I was more excited cause at the time it was like 3:30 when he called and that meant only 2 and a half hours instead of like 5 and a half. I rushed home... I dunno why. I just needed to do something with myself. I started laundry at my parents and rang sir jeffamus telling him how freaking amazing this news was and he was coming with me so I was just all around HAPPY. I found the airport all good and stuff. I AM 30 percent smarter since becoming a burnette. (hehe) Well I had to go around the stupid circle like 3 times cause I didnt know where to park and there is only one parking exit. (superweak) ANYWAYS I found it and JEFF got me lost saying the first terminal and junk. So then Mr griggs said I am at terminal dose. SO we had to figure out how to get to that terminal. WE found it and there were these obnoxiously SLOW people in front of me. ALL I WANTED WAS TO SEE MY DAVID. We started down the elevator and I SAW HIM. I wanted to jump off the elevator and run and tackle him. I didn't though I waited for the people in front of me to move their asses out of my way and I booked it to him! =D
I didn't take pictures, but I should have now that I think about it. It was kind of funny cause I practically ran him over trying to get a hug from him. (hehe) but all in all, we were so excited. Dave almost forgot Lord Jeffamus, I had to remind him... lol. NO BIG DEAL. I was just so happy to see him. I have never been a fan of public displays of affection, but I was all over this kid in the middle of an airport. Ya be jealous. I was so happy to have him home and snuggle! (I MISSED SNUGGLES FROM DAVE MOST OF ALL) We drove back to Spanish Fork, well Jeff and Jess drove us back to Spanish fork. I was too busy, snuggling...right right.
HA I still smile to myself thinking about it. Anyways we got to Dave's home cause we had to see his momma ya know? So we got there and his mom, Sue, sat there and stared at him for a second... she was in the other room and she was staring at him, guess she forgot who he was. 7 months is a real long time after all. She was real happy and they were making a welcome home sign for him but they were a bit behind on it, but they didn't know he was coming home early. NO BIG DEAL, nobody's perfect.

ANYWAYS I'm just real happy to have him home. And I hope that most of my friends can meet him while he is home.

remember to breath by dashboard confessional. I had to remind myself when I first saw him to do this.

Dont go away mad.

So I am a talker. I enjoy talking about myself, things going on, things that bug me, things I love, ya get it. I love to talk about myself. I like to think I am a very excellent listener as well. And if asked I will give my honest opinion. As long as I can stay friendly with whomever I am speaking to. Well I have one friend who I sometimes worry about but love none the less. And She LOVES to complain. And I am trying to be a good friend and be patient and happy when she's happy and upset with whoever did her wrong. But CMON! It has been like two months and the conversation drags on. I just got tired of the constant complaints and try to bring up positive things, (example: I say well I love ya girl. and SHE says at least someone does) I mean WTF am I supposed to say to that!? I am so done that I just walk away now. NOW that i'm so close, waiting all this time and just SOOO close she cant even pretend to be happy for me. NOT ONE BIT. I mean why not I mean I listen to her sad stories and try to help in any way possible why cant she just give me this. When I do say stuff that makes me happy she usually says, can you not talk about that in front of me cause I dont have anyone to love me. I just ask her why she cant be happy for me. Just one time. I dont think I get a word in edge wise when I talk to her either. UGH. Maybe I'm just tired of listening to complaining so I have to myself but, I just had to get it off my chest. WELL 2 more days!!!


dont go away mad by motley crue. That song has my favorite saying in it. "don't go away mad, just go away" I dont know why I put it. BUUUUT maybe

I do

Light up the sky

Unfortunately I missed the inauguration. I am not too concerned about that though. I personally have no views on who should be president. I can only hope that Obama does good with the time that he is given. I think that is all that any president can do. I would have to make a list of things that I do believe in, but that would be too long. I do believe though that people should make a vow. Little things, like "recycling" etc. I do not have something that big... I vow to smile at people I see. Since I'm a good looking person when a good looking person smiles at you, you think "gosh they're nice" (if they aren't good looking you are just wondering 'what do they want? creepy') Besides the point. A smile I think goes a long way. People in good moods are much more fun to be around then people who are not so happy. That's my resolution first of all and my vow. As a person.
Back to the president. I just hope he does good for what has been laid before him.
Other exciting news I ...well I'm just in a good mood lately. No reasons just happy as a clam. (whatever that is supposed to mean)
If you do not know why...well then you haven't seen me nearly enough and should probably call me or something.


Light up the sky by yellowcard. I think of this title as big fireworks and i was putting it because of the inauguration

the kids aren't alright

I worked at brickoven last night and got off around 12 ish.... talked to boyfriend for an hour or so after ... and just stayed up til 5 and went to American eagle. BLAH. I think that working at 6 in the morning should be considered illegal. And punishable by law. I havn't slept and I am so tired.
I found out something that I always SORT of knew but didn't really think it was that big of a deal... until today. I have OCD about stupid clothes and making things strait, even numbers, everything needs to be perfect. IM stupid. It took me from 6 in the morning to 1 in the afternoon to finish ONE table where half the others finished 3 in the time it took me to finish one. I couldn't just leave a stack of decently folded clothes alone. It was perfectly symmetrical, just right color coded and all back stocked properly. There were 9 stacks of t shirts that needed to be folded a certain way and have a size run of 3 in each stack. (3 extra smalls, 3 smalls, 3 mediums....get the picture?) Anyways I couldn't stop myself I tried to just hurry and throw shit together and finish it but... I stopped and re did the whole thing. It was a bloody nightmare for me. I have never been so anxious and nervous about something. It was a very strange feeling for me to have. I don't like it. I mean I knew that I was a bit obsessive about having things aligned and strait and even but I was just strait up out of control. People commented on it, they said the table looked great. I just felt slow, like mentally handicapped or something. OH well. No more floorsets for a while now I hope. I'm finally getting my hair re done back to a dark auburn and shorter... i like the short hair. SOOOO I'm keeping it like such.
P.S. I miss my mom and dad and my home and my big warm bed back in spanish fork sooo i'm off to visit... maybe fall asleep in my bed... for like... 20 minutes. Maybe visit the Griggs, ya know... just some normal sunday stuff.
Have a goooood sunday!!

the kids aren't alright by the offspring. I mostly just put that title because of how I was feeling.

six feet under the stars

SO I didnt work last night, which was nice but I babysat. That girl is OFF THE WALL crazy but she was fun to have around. Everyone in my apartment kept asking if it was my little sister. hehe. Anyways When her momma came to pick her up Abbie had a sweet new tie on... with STARS! And she mentioned to me how I got MINE TOO. FINALLY after a year I think I deserve them. So go Me. I am a bad ass employee NOW. haha. That does remind me I need new black work pants....crud. Well I'm gonna work the hell out of this tie.
PS its now down to single digets little more than a week left!!!


Six feet under the stars by All time low. I only picked this song because it has the word stars in it. YAY.

Crappy Love Ballad

Ok. So I know this sounds so cliche but HOW do you KNOW you are in LOVE with someone. Especially after ONLY a couple weeks. I don't see how there is ANY WAY that could happen. How can people get married after only knowing someone for a couple weeks. Let alone think about the L word. I have decided that LOVE is not a feeling, it's an ability. Love doesn't solve problems in a marriage, doesn't tie families together for all eternity. Love comes from other things. I was talking to this guy who I mostly think its just a TARD, but he made some very VERY good points about relationships. I cant remember all of the 5 points he made but I will give you the gist.
In a relationship you need social interaction, physical, and spiritual help. For example physical is obviously a LOT of things that no one really understood at first but i caught on. Love is physical, shelter is physical, caring, food, and like helping each other with house hold chores. Also Courtesy, I mean simple please and and thank you goes a long way. Spiritual I didn't quite understand where he was going with that... maybe you could figure out something for that? And Social interaction. It doesn't mean you have to go out with friends EVERY TIME. I mean you could just go the two of you and go to a movie... and I have a very strong belief in having your own friends that you can always go out and do something with.
And ya know what, if you can do all these things for one person for the rest of your life well good for you! I hope to accomplish all of this one day. I believe any relationship can work out. But why rush things. First of all if you jump in to the marriage boat too early, here are some questions you should ask your self
"what's he like around children" "how does he want to raise his/her children" What is he like when he is angy" "what is he like during normal hours of the day just at home hanging out" "What are his vices, and are they things that are going to irritate you" "whats his family like." There are so many things to ask yourself about this thing. Cause marriage isn't just some temporary thing (at least not for me, I want to be 100 percent sure before I accept anything.)
Also What is up with people who are all sorts of IN LOVE for about ... 20 seconds then move on to the next guy like they're going to get married. Like they have been engaged like 100 times since the day they turned 16? How does that even happen? Do you think they ever really loved anyone? Do they even love themselves? I guess I shouldn't worry about other people it was just something that I never understood. But I don't understand a lot about what people are capable of doing. Examples are killing, cheating, lieing, etc.
So the best I can do is be happy with what I am doing and hope for the best. I know what I feel and I will know when I am 100 percent ready.
I feel like I have grown up so much these last couple of months, to realize what a relationship is all about and what I could do to keep it in good shape. So far I think I'm doing a good job :)

Anyways, good luck to all of you with your relationships now and in the present. I hope that what I said has help show you just a smidgen of what I have learned

Crappy Love Ballad by Angels and Airwaves
I have just recently found this band and I really LOVE this song. You should check it OUT.

No other way

I cant believe that my seven month wait is almost over. I AM SO EXCITED.. =)
Only 15 more days til i can actually see him... thats pretty awesome I would have to say.
Besides that nothing really new here... I am getting my hair re dyed this next week so I dont look like an angry red head. working all mornings no nights.. (except monday and saturday) its when I have made the most so i'll keep those...until my 3 weeks are up then I will change back my availability. AND I have been working out a lot more. So I hope that'll make the endorphins go so I will be more constantly happy instead of constantly UN happy. Cause no one likes a unhappy person.
This wednesday I am going with some friends to A real nice Italian place at the gateway. Then to see Bridewars. (ps I already seen it.. but I will go see it again) shhhhh. HA, sorry girls. Anyways.
I was thinking about how long ago 7 months was... and how quickly its gone by. All those months ago saying I'll wait. WOW cant believe I actually did it! (go me)
I would have it no other way though = )

No other way by Jack Johnson. I just really like this song.

Time wont let me go

New Day, New year.
I never understood why people get all worked up over a new year, but I suppose its another day to have an excuse to drink and party. Anyways Pretty uneventful for me. I just worked and came home to hang out with my parents, and after the clock turned midnight we said hey... happy new year. Good NIGHT. But a new year is a good day for a FRESH START. I have a couple goals that I want to stick to, and we'll see how I do. I figure if I cant hold up in this first month well, there is no chance for it to happen the rest of the year! It takes 30 days to make a habit.
1- I will not say the word "HATE" anymore.
It's a strong word and I think not saying that word will help me stay positive.
2-If I buy something for myself I have to buy something for someone else.
I cant buy myself a new pair a jeans and someone else a pack of gum, it's gotta be of equal or greater value. Maybe this will stop my shopping habit for good.
3-Be active.
I don't want to be the fat girlfriend, or well fat at all! I need to stay active to do all the things that I want to do. I think it'll just keep me happy anyways.
4-No More SODA.
I was trying so hard to not drink it, but its a hard habit to break. Starting today NO MORE SODA EVER!
5-Be a better friend.
I just want to be a person that people can talk to about anything. I want to be a good listener and help out anyway that I can.
6-Be a better employee.
As much as I hate my job, it's good money for now and a good job for school. I will try and be better about not being hateful about being there. People are jerks I know this, I need to just get over it.
7- Be nicer in the morning times.
Its not everyone elses fault that I stayed up late and had to wake up early. I just need to be nicer to the people who just happen to be in my way.
8- Do something good for me.
Wether it is just a gym trip, manicure, facial, back massages, I need a stress reliever. I will get a gym pass and start going to a dance class once a month or something. I love it and I think that it will be the best thing for me.

Well that is all I got so far. I think that I could keep going but this is gonna be more than I can handle anyways.

Time wont let me go by The bravery. Time never stops it keeps going and you just gotta roll with it.